Wood chips and long silver slides.
These are the first things I recall when I fondly think of the recesses of my youth. There were days I wasn’t picked for kickball and days where someone made fun of my Michelin man snow suit.
There were even days when I felt alone and left out.
And, I learned many great lessons on the various playgrounds I spent time on. What I also know is that I was an extraordinary hyperactive child and recess and gym were my outlets.
It was my outlet and my creative space. I could push through those huge doors and run free at the sound of a bell.
It was the only time where someone wasn’t telling me what to do, or to slow down and be quiet.
My youngest son is in the fifth grade and this freedom has been taken from him. His school decided (without the help of the PTO) to fix what wasn’t broken.
I am kneeling next to his bed, where he is submerged under two big soft blankets. My sweet 11 year-old boy.
I ask him, “Will you forgive me?”
Me, the mother who vowed she would never be like her mother, earlier in the night repeating patterns that broke me as a child. Repeating the fighting and the biting words to my husband, loud and boisterous for all the house to hear. And he ran to his room sobbing, his chest heaving in deep cries.read more
Today I am sharing an article a fellow writer, Marlena Graves, posted in Today’s Christian Woman.
Depression disappears in my life and then knocks on my door, often blindsiding me.
I am a Christian and I struggle with depression.read more
When I bought my last bathing suit, I didn’t think much about it. I have four kids who love the pool and I needed a suit. Simple.
Somewhere in the back of my mind, I guess I thought it might help me blend in (or dare I say, disappear?) at the local pool where it can feel like all of us Moms are in a sorority pledge line-up.read more
For everything there is a season.read more
She sits in the chair, her head hung low, the tears falling so quickly they land, not on her cheeks, but on her shaking arms. Her pain so palpable you can feel it in the small room, you can see it in the bodies of those witnessing and watching her sob. Often the others in the group shift in their seats, wanting something to interrupt the sounds of her cries, something to make them more comfortable as they watch her cry, watch her pain, and see her let it out.read more
What makes you enough? "I realized I would rather follow my heart, even if it is really hard, that is worth taking a risk on.” Says Michael John, an aspiring Magician on this season’s America’s Got Talent. "These might be the most important 90 seconds of my life so...read more
Wind keeps sailboats moving in the direction determined by the stern or the bow or the skipper. I know nothing about sailing, so I just picked these words since they are sailing words.
I do know that the wind is necessary and crucial for sailing.
I have lost the wind.
I can’t find it in the morning. I can’t find it in the evening.read more
I came into the world screaming with a voice meant for outdoor sporting events and an energy level rivaling a teenager filled with Red Bull.
With this gregarious personality also came a sensitive little spirt that was hell-bent on rescuing every wounded animal. This was how God made me, but it didn’t quite fit into the tidy world where “ladies” were supposed to be polite and quiet. And ladies were NOT supposed to be bubbling over with buckets of tears.
What would have helped me? What would have possibly prevented me from a life of compartmentalization, an eating disorder, and depression?
A movie like ‘Inside Out’.read more
Rachel Dolezal and Rachel Farrokh.
Two Rachels. Two very different stories plastered in the media.
Yet, when side by side the similarities are striking. Both fighting for missions they deem to be worthy of attention and both pointing shaky arrows at the target.read more
Sitting on an airplane last week I was excited to dive into my recent copy of People magazine.
A brainless feat, a pure escape.
Until I opened the page to a story about Dance Mom Abby Lee and her dramatic weight loss that came from vomiting.read more
I have a friend, who when she signs in at our elementary school for a visitor pass, instead of writing the date on the pass or on the sign-in sheet just writes…Today.
Not the date or the time. Today.
She says it is because all she can think about is today, that it is too complicated to put the date, the time or the moment.
I see it differently, I see it as a beautiful reminder of living in the moment. This moment we have right now…is simply today.
Today is all we have in front of us.read more
I have never quite felt like I fit in.
As a young child my family jokingly referred to me as the “other child” or “the accident”. A funny statement that left me with an identity crisis early on. That told me something was wrong with me because I wasn’t like the others. I found myself constantly scrutinizing and asking myself…is this me? Is this where I belong? Is this who I am supposed to be?
Moving to four different schools in four years offered me an opportunity to try out new identities. There was the preppy me, the rocker me, the rebellious me and then the perfect me. Trying to mold and shape and become something the world might like, someone the world might accept.
Part of this exploration is quite normal as we try to figure out who were are and where we fit, but as I continued on this never ending quest I began to seek after God’s acceptance too. Was I good enough for God? Did I fit with who he wanted me to be? Was I a good enough Christian?read more
What women want, no matter if they are struggling with an eating disorder, depression, addiction, and/or the day- to-day living…what women need, more than anything, is to hear this one simple phrase.read more
While all of us can most likely agree that it is fantastic she is reaching out for help, those of us who work in the field and have struggled with the disease know there is more to this story than is being told.
The media jumps on these sensationalized stories of shock and awe. Look at how low a weight she is, look at her bones, and how could she get like that? Ohhh ahhh shock and awe.read more